| {{dating}}We
spend almost a quarter of our lives in a work environment. So it shouldn't come
as a surprise that sparks may fly between co-workers. If handled well, a workplace
relationship can be a life-long committment. But if it goes wrong, the results
can be devastating. |
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Although American culture separates business from
pleasure / career from relationships, today's corporate driven society has become
a likely place for people to meet a partner. If you didn't meet someone during
your college or university years, meeting someone at the office may be one of
the best options left for you to find your soul mate. Large vs. Small
Workplace
Falling for a fellow employee while working in a small-to-medium
size office can be especially hard with everyone knowing everyone else's personal
and work-related business. But this is the very reason that it happens so often--the
day-to-day involvement with a small number of co-workers brings people closer
together emotionally, as well as physically. It's also why you should seriously
consider the consequences of getting involved in a relationship in a small work
place. Larger offices generally have a less personal environment and offer a bit
more privacy between co-workers.
To Date... or Not to Date
Working
along side or near a person of interest allows you to get closer without the jitters
or nervousness. In general group conversations, you will learn a lot about each
other's opinions and interests and even ways of seeing the world. Now you've come
to the fork in the road and have to decide if moving ahead in a relationship is
worth the risk.
First, you need to understand your reason for dating someone
at work. Is it the thrill, the flirting, the glances, the playful jokes and letters?
Is it lust or a real love interest? You may get a lift and feel desirable, but
you need to get beyond that feeling of excitement and focus on the reality of
the person you're interested in. Both partners need to understand the motives
and long-term desires of the other to make a decision to move ahead. Talk it out
first.
Also, keep in mind that having an office affair is like being stuck
in a small town, complete with gossips, back-stabbers and people who want to hurt
your reputation in order to acquire your credibility and business. All relationships
have benefits and drawbacks. An office romance offers very few advantages over
a traditional dating situation and tend to be superficial.
Drama in
the Workplace
In the same way that a traditional dating situation can
turn sour, an office romance can be filled with drama. The difference is the fall
out can affect a lot more than just your relationship.
- Tension in the
relationship can cause additional stress on the job.
- Distance between
your co-workers widens resulting in lost trust and friendship.
- Personal
space during disagreements or spats will be hard to come by when you work in the
same arena.
- Resentment by co-workers can cause sabotage or gossip resulting
in lost opportunities for promotion or raises.
- The thrill of clandestine
intimacy can put you in an awkward position, if you're caught.
Ending
a Workplace Relationship
As with many relationships,
you may find that this one isn't working out. If you decide that it's not working
and you need to end the relationship, consider the possible repercussions.
- Those
40-hour work weeks may begin to feel like an eternity.
- Breaking
off a normal relationship is much easier in that you no longer have to see the
other person. The same rule doesn't apply when it comes to an office romance.
- The distraction of a breakup can affect your work performance.
Jealousy and the day to day unavoidable contact can also affect your relationship
with other employees especially if they move on to another relationship within
the company.
- Your private discussions may be brought out in a moment
of vengeance. Be careful with your opinions and especially those about coworkers.
They may come back to haunt you.
If it's true love, the relationship
will ultimately work out. But make sure you conduct yourself with integrity and
business-like decorum to protect your future employment. Keep the drama outside
of the office. If it comes to an end, make sure you keep it as 'clean' as possible
to avoid any potential fallout. {{/dating}}
By Vanessa May
DateShowcase.com
© 2007
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