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{{dating}}You
have an attention-getting user name, a great photo and an interesting profile
that draws a lot of attention, but things can still fall apart if you're sending
out an awkward response to other people's personal ads. Here are some dos and
don'ts to help you write the perfect response: |
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The DO's:
Plan in Advance:
Be prepared with more than one response idea. You may want to reply with humor
to one personal ad and in a more serious way to another. By planning ahead of
time, you have time to think about what you want to say and review your message
before actually posting it. Have a friend read and react to your draft message
and make changes accordingly.
Spell-check and Proper Grammar:
Show that you are serious about finding quality dates by paying attention to details.
Many intelligent people are just naturally bad spellers, but bad spelling and
poor grammar can make you look less educated than you actually are. Find any errors
by using a word processor with spell-check to write your draft before posting
your response.
Personalize Your Response: If you plan to respond
to multiple personal ads, it makes sense to use a general template. But you will
want your response to be personalized for each person. No one appreciates a form
letter but many will respond with enthusiasm when you acknowledge that you've
taken the time to personalize your response by referring to something in their
profile.
Don't Be Too Long or Too Brief: "Liked your profile.
. .want to chat?" This may be the most common response to a personal ad - and
the most ignored. On the flip side, sharing your life's story can be a big turn-off.
The perfect personal ad response will draw attention to your reply by setting
yourself apart from the rest with an interesting, to-the-point response.
Keep
Track of Your Contacts: Avoid writing a series of posts to someone who
has not yet responded to you. Desperation is never appealing and quite the turn-off.
Also, you may end up being labeled a stalker.
The DON'Ts:
Asking
for Personal Information: Never request personal information on your first
contact; that can happen after you've decided to pursue things further. Don't
request a phone number, address, or last name before you have even gotten a reply
back. Your response should be friendly and inviting and show a balance of interest
in their profile and information about yourself.
Share Failed Relationship
Details: Avoid any mention of past or failed relationships. It's a hard
topic to speak of without sounding whiney or bitter. You also risk appearing obsessed
and unable to move on.
Use Sex as a Come-On: Unless the personal
ad indicates a desire for a casual sexual relationship and you agree, never use
sexual innuendo, vulgar or rude language. Women, typically delete them; men expect
a link to a porn site.{{/dating}}
By Vanessa May
DateShowcase.com © 2007
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