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 Ending a Relationship

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Relationships can dissolve when there are too many differences to overcome or when they simply run their course. Ending a relationship is never easy! No matter why it ends, the hurt feelings that come with a break up can be eased by following a few simple suggestions.

Make a Quick Clean Break! - Perhaps the most damaging thing you can do when ending a relationship is to drag it out. Breaking up in stages just doesn't work either. If you think you'll be sparing bad feelings, forget it. You'll be inflicting more hurt and pain all along the way by avoiding the inevitable.

Honesty IS the Best Policy! - Fudging the reason for ending a relationship does no one any good and confuses the issue. Obviously, you don't want to say hurtful things but admitting the reason why a relationship is ending may provide awareness to possible problems to look out for the next time.

Don't Play the Blame Game! - Both sides of an ill-fated relationship have their own reasons for placing the blame on the other person. Honestly try to see what part you played in the failed relationship and move on. Avoid picking a fight and pointing a finger; it won't ease the sadness or guilt and serves no purpose other than looking for blame. In the end, doesn't much matter.

Allow Time to Heal! - A particularly hurtful move is to start a new relationship before you have made a clean break from your current one - causing unnecessary pain to your ex. Give yourself plenty of time to clear your heart and head before getting back into the dating game.

Ex-Lovers = Ex-Friends! - It's almost unheard of that an intimate relationship can turn back to just 'friends'. Don't delay the pain of a relationship's end by believing in the fantasy of a platonic relationship.

Have that Heart-to-Heart! - Allow your partner to 'let it all out' verbally and emotionally when a relationship is ending. And never involve your friends, family or co-workers who will only add to your sadness and confusion.

Choose the Time & Place! - Never announce the end of a relationship in a public place or when you're in an emotional state. You may embarrass your partner or yourself and regret what you say in the heat of the moment. Plan to meet in a quiet place and allow for plenty of time to talk it through.

Promises! Promises? - Don't make promises that you know you won't or can't keep. False promises to stay in touch, remain friends or to suggest that you may get back together after a time apart will only make matters worse.

Remember the old saying, "if you don't have anything nice to say" Well, you know the rest! Breaking up is hard on both partners. Always remember that you shared something special with this person for a time. Regardless of who or what caused the break up, you both have a right to your dignity.


By Vanessa May

DateShowcase.com © 2007
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